Thursday, January 04, 2007

Is It Better To Live Together Before Marriage?

The statistics are higher than ever for couples living together. So many people are taking this route rather than to just jump in and tie the not, but let’s check out the pros and cons of both sides before making any judgement.

People are changing their mentalities and views on this rather hot topic, especially in today’s ever changing society. More and more couples are taking this road and living together before making the big decision as to whether they wish to spend the rest of their lives together.

Of course, who is to blame for all the divorces happening in today’s society? Generations ago, when people got married, it really was “for better or for worse”. They stuck it out, through sickness, health, adultery, everything. But now, you do not go a day without hearing about someone’s marriage falling apart. So does this mean that it is a good idea to live together?

Many people who wait to live with someone until they are married are religious. As the Bible says, you should not live with someone unless you are married. You should not have sex unless you are married. But again, in our society, there are few virgins left. Our generation loses their virginity in their early teens. So this does not really apply to us anymore. Couples are still having sex whether they are living together or not.

Couples who live together often say that they do this prior to marriage because they want to see if their partner and they will really fit together… to get to really know them. So, they live together. I was once told by someone who is married, “You will never really know the other person until you live with them”. This is so true. Now many people say, especially religious persons, that you do not need to live with a person, all you have to do is spend a lot of time together. Although I do see some sense in this, it is still a very big issue that a lot of people wear masks while dating. They may keep these masks on for years. So even if you date someone for 5 years, they may still turn out to be someone totally different once you marry.

In my opinion, which is based on observing so many different relationships, both married, living together and dating, I have come to realize that it may be good to live together before marriage. I mean, who would be proud of saying that they have been married 5 times because they got married at a young age and it did not work out, so they got married over and over again? Of course, marriage is a great thing, if you are ready for it. It all just depends on who you are, you values and background and where you are in life. To each his own.

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